That Happy Feeling

That feeling of accomplishment, of success, of I-want-to-share-this-with-everyone. That smile that comes unbidden, effortlessly. That joy you want to share with others as your day unfolds.

This is the “why”.

This is the answer.

Because when it works, when we get that pat on the back or that certificate or that final version that does what it should – we get to feel this thing that can’t be felt any other way.

And this is a precious feeling. I’d forgotten how it feels.

This isn’t my “got the chore done” feeling, which is all I’ve been striving for lately. This was something different, something┬áthat didn’t have to be done. Nobody made me study for this test. Nobody forced me to pick up that book last year and start down this path. And nobody noticed (well, maybe one certain spouse person) when I got bogged down and didn’t finish what I’d started. And nobody could have known that the weather would turn bad and I’d end up going in to take the test because I was here and it didn’t cost that much and worst case scenario I have to take it again…

A bog of fog – nothing to it but mist. A mist that kept me away for quite a while. I did fine, quite well. I studied for a couple of days and pulled it off. I knew I could. I just… needed an excuse. ? Well that sounds lame.

If only I’d known how good it would feel.

It’s quite frankly a bit of a temptation. I want to feel it again. I want to feel it every day. Wouldn’t that be the life to live? The life to share?

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